R.J. and Jacara have a difficult first day working together. R.J. shows up late, annoying Jacara, who wanted to discuss their strategy before tlaking to a very good bass player's agent. They are unable to make a deal with the agent. Jacara blames their lack of preparation thanks to R.J.'s tardiness. R.J. accuses Jacara of sabatoging the deal in some sort of power play. Rachel intervenes and tells them to calm down. Jacara agrees to go to dinner with R.J. and discuss the situation.

The rest of the day was full of fantasy, thanks to the book "Sex and the Mature Woman." After reading the book, Carlotta has a fantasy about Hank and some ice cubes, which later becomes reality. Dorian fantasizes about Mel being a painter who's good with a paint brush. She calls Mel at the Banner and gets him to come to her house. Instead of painting, he writes "Mel was here" on various parts of Dorian's body in purple magic marker...permanent magic marker. Viki has a fantasy of her own and is surprised to realize that Clint is the man of her dreams. In between the fantasies, Jessica also convinces Clint to hire Cristian as a cartoonist for the Banner.

Line of Day

Eddie to Andy: "You should know it is bad luck to see the groom in his animal skins before the wedding!"

Since this is fantasy week, what is on your personal Llanview wish list? Door number one is a Bridal Shower at the fabled Serenity Springs. Hot tubs, wine, massages, dishing the dirt with the girls. Door number two is Texas barbecue in the kitchen at Llanfair with Viki and her cowboy ex husband Clint. Tame stuff, but who could resist the possiblity of a tour of Llanview's White House. Door number three is Angel Square's own Tar beach, a place where hunks gather to drink liquor, throw a pig skin and play King of the Jungle. If you chose Door number three, Beware. They will be sending your email......to the Llanview Jail.

The Bridal Shower at Serenity Springs

Nora and Bo have a bet who can throw the best party. The ladies are certainly having a great time as Max checks in on his sister in the hot tub and remarks how he is definitely headed to the wrong party, leaving behind all these beautiful women. The ladies put a wreath around Andy's head and Nora insists the youngest and most innocent must go first with the presents. Jessie gives Andy a not so innocent white see-through negligee. Maggie contributes a basket of lotions and toiletries. But the most amazing gift came from Senora Vega- a very sexy thong for the honeymoon. There's a lot of chuckling, but Carlotta reminds them about how she became a mother. Andy and Carlotta share a tender moment where Antonio's mother gives her blessing to the young couple amid happy tears and hugging. Marty gives Andy a heart shaped locket on a chain. Dr. Saybrooke says that Andy is her inspiration. Andy is moved. She wonders aloud how she will leave them all behind. But she is a cock-eyed optimist and champion of the happy ending. Nora calls for a massage for everyone and as she and the others clear up the mess from the shower, Linda takes a moment to congratulate Andy sincerely on her wedding to Antonio. Andy's beeper goes off and she tells them that she must cover for Benny, who is out tonight. It's will be her goodbye to the job. She will see them all tomorrow.

Jessica tells Marty she thinks she will be embarassed by the massage, but Marty says it is alright to wear her bathing suit. There's a first time for everything. Nora is exuberantly happy, flying on her fourth cup of coffee and tells Carlotta so. The mother of the groom confesses how great it will be to finally have a daughter. As much as she loves her boys, a daughter is different. This launches a discussion of "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars." There are lots of laughs about not asking for directions, not knowing where to find things, etc. Jessica says women are better communicators, with nods to exclude poets like Patrick. They all wonder about the men and if they are headed home to fall asleep on the baseball game.

Llanfair- Clint and Viki

Clint has pounds of Sirloin. He got carried away at the butcher's. He offers to grill the steaks if Viki makes the potato salad. She agrees. He asks to include Jessica and Kevin and make it a family affair. He also bemoans Joey not being in town. Viki tells him that she heard from Joey, who is restoring a fresco in Italy and she is planning to visit him after her conference in London. As for Jessica, she is at the Shower, but Kevin is a good idea. He will be in charge of the Banner when Viki is in London and Clint at the ranch in Arizona. They will also need him to keep an eye on his little sister. Viki calls her son at the Gatehouse and he agrees to come for dinner in about 20 minutes. When he hangs up, Cassie asks if she was invited. Kevin says they are a package deal. Cassie replies that his family has not welcomed her with open arms. Viki is loyal to Andrew. And Clint is concerned about their deportment at the newspaper. Kevin thinks everyone needs to relax and accept them as a couple.

When the couple arrives, Viki smiles when she sees Kevin and Cassie but it is obvious by the fourth setting she hastily places on the table, she was not expecting Cassie. Cassie wants to leave, but Kevin won't hear of it. His father said they had personal things to discuss, but as far as the younger Buchanan was concerned, anything Clint had to say could be said in front of Cassie. He doesn't keep secrets. If she isn't welcome... Viki insists they both stay.

Kevin and his parents discuss Jessie and how they trust her, but they advise Kevin to keep a subtle eye on her. Cassie offers to help out, but Viki comments that she has her own son to look after. Cassie replies that River gets plenty of attention from her despite the situation. Kevin gets up, says he has had enough of everything and makes a rapid departure with Cassie in tow. After they leave, Viki says that it was awful, so forced. Clint thinks they were polite. His ex wife wonders how he missed the "rampant nuances flying around" Llanfair. MEN!!!

Viki and Clint discuss whether Cassie and Kevin are happpy as they do the dishes together. She is getting better at not interfering and he is improved in the dish cleaning department. Clint invites her to the ranch after her London conference. She refuses. He wants to know why, but he won't tell him. Clint leaves and Viki is left standing in the kitchen, wondering at it all.

Back at the Gatehouse- Kevin and Cassie Kevin wants his parents to accept Cassie. He has her for better or worse and they are the real deal. Cassie says she left her husband and child for him, but she says it in a lifeless mater of fact manner, like it explains all her feelings for Kevin. This prompts Kevin to ask whether she already wanted to leave Andrew and River and he just happened to be there (Téa's accusation)? Cassie never answers the questions, resorting instead to a seductive kiss.

Tar Beach- A rooftop in Angel Square- starring the Llanview Guys

Max arrives and says why not go back to Serenity Springs. A gender mixed party appeals to him. Bo says this is serious busines. They are roasting a suckling pig. Andrew couldn't make it because of Eli, who is missing from the hospital. Cris, Eddie and Mickey show up. They have animalskins they raided from Eddie's uncle's auto supply store. Antonio warns Cris to take it easy on the booze. He needs his best man to get him to the church on time the next day. Ian thinks that it is all ritual rooted in antiquity. Patrick quotes Shakespeare. Loud music plays and longneck beers are being drunk. Cris, Eddie and Mickey doctor the punch with booze, but Eddie adds more than the recipe calls for. They take bets on who is the wilder man - the police commissioner or the district attorney.

Max proposes a toast to his soon to be brother in law for a long life and happiness. Bo tells Antonio he must be initiated into the tribe. Antonio is skeptical that the punch conforms to Poppy's recipe. Hank gives a Tarzan yell. Ian reminds him that Tarzan was an Englishman. Bo gives it a try. Neighbors begin to yell they will call the police. Hank and Bo get competitive about who is the law. They decide to settle it by arm wrestling. A triumphant Hank wins. Eddie says he was right about the DA being a wild man. Bo says only the law of the jungle rules tonight and Antonio is the king of that jungle. They begin to sing " The Lion Sleeps tonight" Wing a whet! Wing a whet! in honor of Antonio's gang name. The neighbors continue to shout comments up to the rowdy crowd on the roof.

Hank decides it is time for a football game, but there is no pigskin available. Why not the real thing. He takes what remains of the suckling pig and throws it to Bo, who misses it. The sound of shattering glass alerts them that they have broken a window. Hank says Bo is no wide receiver. Andy arrives. Eddie says it is bad luck to see the groom in his animal skins before the wedding. Detective Harrison tells them they are all arrested.

Llanview Jail

Max wants to know how Andy can arrest him- he's her "sister." She corrects him by saying he is her brother and he taught her never to let her personal feelings interfere with her job. Bo argues he is her boss, but she reminds him that she will be out of the job by the time they are all let out. She throws the whole crew in the holding cell, except Antonio who has managed to stay relatively sober. She confides to him that Mr. Rodriguez knows they are getting married tomorrow and he is not going to press charges over the broken window. She just wants the guys to sober up in the drunk tank for a while. She tells him about all the presents and he tells her that Eddie spiked the punch. They enjoy a pre- wedding kiss. A mischevious Antonio rattles the cage with a borrowed nightstick and wakes his sleeping friends. As they are released, a drunken stranger in the back of the holding cell, tries to leave with them, but Andy firmly escorts him back in. Bo threatens the jailer on duty if he tells anyone he or Hank spent part of the night in the drunk tank. When they are gone, Antonio thinks maybe they should elope. But Andy says there is not a chance and teases him with another kiss.

THE DINER-Mel, Dorian, Hank, Carlotta, Antonio

Carlotta is making the wedding cake. Dorian comes in and they talk about Antonio's wedding and the party tomorrow. Hank comes in, hungover. He says hi to them, and Carlotta tells Dorian that he has been at Antonio's bachelor party. Hank tells them about the party, and that he ended up in jail. Mel comes to meet Dorian. Mel has a concoction that he thinks will help Hank. Hank says that Andy is the one who arrested them in the first place. Antonio shows up to see his mother. He says goodnight to her and goes home. He calls Andy and they talk about tomorrow. Hank tells Carlotta how much it meant to him that Antonio wanted him at his party. Hank asks what is going on between him and Carlotta. She says that whatever is happening is great, and she wants it to keep going.

Dorian asks Mel to go to Philadelphia with her the following day, before the wedding, and he says yes. Then he asks her to spend the night at his place, and she says she will.

THE POLICE DEPT.-Bo and Nora

Nora goes into Bo's office, she finds Bo under his desk, He looks awful. He is still dressed in his zebra suit from the bachelor party. He tells her that he was in jail and everything. Nora takes Bo to Serenity Springs and directs him to the hot tub. He gets in fully clothed. Nora joins him. Bo says that he wonders if he makes her happy, because he doesn't want to take her for granted. Nora says that she loves him and she doesn't feel like she is being taken for granted. He says he wants her to be well, and she says she is fine, just stressed. Andy comes back to Serenity Springs to pick some things up, and sees the Buchanan's in the hot tub. They leave.

THE PENTHOUSE-Andrew, Téa, Todd

Andrew arrives at Todd's to talk to him about Eli. He tells him that Eli ran away and nobody has seen him for two days. Andrew tells him that the police are looking for him. He asks Todd to put a headline about Eli in the Sun, so if someone has seen Eli, they will report it. Todd also offers to pay for Eli's mother's funeral, since nobody else will. He goes upstairs. Andrew asks Téa how she is doing. She says she is good. They discuss Todd and his motives, Téa says that she thinks Todd is smart. Andrew asks if she is getting emotionally involved with Todd, which she denies. She says it is sympathy, not love.

THE ROOF-Maggie, Max, Ian

Maggie goes to the roof and finds Ian and Max, who are cleaning up after the party. They talk about the party. Ian leaves for his hotel, Maggie and Max stay on the roof and discuss the upcoming wedding. Max says he is lucky to have found Maggie. They go to Serenity Springs and run into Andy there. She thanks Maggie for the party. Max and Maggie go to bed.

THE RECTORY-Andrew, Eli, Kelly

Andrew goes back to the rectory and Kelly is there babysitting. She asks if there is any word on Eli. He says no, and tells her about the headline in the Sun. There is a knock on the door, it is Eli. He says hi and Andrew asks where he has been. Eli says he was in the hospital basement, and he spent a night in the park with his friends. He asks who Kelly is, and Andrew introduces them. Kelly goes to make him a sandwich. Eli tells Andrew that he didn't plan to run away. He tells him that he went to see his mother, and the nurse told him that she died, and that he can't see the body. Andrew tells him that he will be able to see his mother at the funeral. Andrew wants him to go to the hospital, but Eli doesn't want to go. Andrew says that if they go to the hospital and he is ok, then he will let Eli come back and spend the night in the rectory. Eli says ok.

Andy, Carlotta, Abuelita, Viki, Jessica and Marty

At the church, they are arranging the flowers for the wedding. After getting an instructional course from Viki on the different kinds of roses, Andy thanks them all for being there and for all of their love, she's never been so happy before.

The church is all decorated, so Jessie, Viki and Marty leave to go get ready. Abuelita leaves to go meet Téa at the diner. Alone, Carlotta puts her arm around Andy's shoulder and they walk around the church. Carlotta said her grandmother walked her around this same church just before she married Diego. She said all the souls of the departed members of the family come to the church on a wedding day to give their blessings. If you're very quiet, you can almost feel there presence. The two women stand quiet for a moment and Andy believes that her mother is there with them. Diego too, Carlotta says and "introduces" Andy to Diego. They finally have the daughter that they always wanted. Eight years ago when her mother died, Andy says, she thought nothing would ever fill that empty space, but now she has Carlotta, who has embraced her as her own. "I love you momma", she says looking upward, then looks at Carlotta and says, "I love you both." They hug each other, tears in their eyes.

Andy and Carlotta go to the diner. Abuelita is there, but Téa hasn't shown up yet, she's late as usual. Abuelita asks about Téa's new husband, Todd, and Andy and Carlotta struggle to find nice things to say about him. Téa finally arrives. Abuelita looks at her and says there is a darkness in her eyes. She asks Téa to tell her about Todd. Téa rambles on about how much Todd has to offer and how they have a connection, but Abuelita notices that one thing is missing, love. Todd won't be at the wedding, he's not into organized religion, Téa explains, but Abuelita can meet him at the reception afterward.

Andy is back at the church and Marty rushes in, dressed for the weddding. Andy takes a moment to look at everything, when she comes in later all she'll see is "my Antonio." Marty rushes her off to get ready.

Antonio, Cristian, Eddie and Mickie

The guys return to the scene of the crime, the rooftop in Angel Square where the bachelor party was held. They have a gift for Antonio, a medallion. It's St. Joseph, the patron saint of married men. Antonio thanks them, gives them each a hug and promises never to take it off.

Later, Antonio comes back on the roof to find Cristian. Cristian isn't there and Antonio looks down at the street and says goodbye to East Llanview. When Antonio turns to leave, the door is locked. He pounds on the door and calls down to the street, but noone hears him. Cristian comes in and Antonio tries to warn him, but it's too late, the door shuts behind him. Now they're both stuck on the roof.

Andrew, Téa, Kelly and Eli

Téa comes to the rectory to see Andrew, who tells her about finding Eli. Because he was off the medication for 48 hours, the viral load has had a chance to build. This is not a good thing, but the doctors are cautiously optimistic. Téa, honestly concerned about Eli, promises to provide for free whatever legal help he might need. Andrew was surprised that Todd was a helpful as he was. He shows her the article about Eli in The Sun with the headline, "Safe, Sound and Sassy."

Andrew must see cases like Eli's all the time, Téa wonders why he got personally involved this time. They both like Alphaman, Andrew says, holding up the comic book. Andrew thinks that Eli should be able to spend at least part of his life in normalcy. Téa suggests looking at some group homes for Eli instead, but Andrew doesn't feel Eli would do well there. He'd let Eli stay at the rectory before he'd put him in a group home. Téa promises to make some calls before she goes to the wedding. Kelly, who stayed overnight, brings River in, all ready to go to camp. Andrew leaves to walk River to the bus. Kelly tries to leave too, saying "bye Mrs. Manning", but Téa tells her "hold it."

Téa tells Kelly to drop the attitude, if she has something to say to her, say it. Kelly tells her that Blair has regained her speech and is back in rehab. That's wonderful, Téa say. Kelly's worried that when Blair finds out that Todd has won full custody of Starr, she'll have another stroke. Everyone knows that Todd only married Téa so he'd have a better chance at winning custody of Starr. Téa says Kelly knows nothing about her marriage to Todd, they worked well and got along well together, marriage was inevitable. Kelly doesn't buy it for a minute. Téa brings up the fact that Dorian is the one who reopened the custody suit, not Todd. Kelly starts listing Todd's crimes, Todd was responsible for all those things, not Dorian, and Dorian isn't responsible for Blair's condition. No she wasn't, "she wasn't the one driving the other car", Téa points out nastily. Andrew comes back into the room and Téa leaves. Kelly asks Andrew not to hate her for being spiteful and mean to Téa. She has this anger inside her and she wants to focus it anywhere but on herself.

Kelly wishes she could go back to that night and never get in the car. You can't, Andrew tells her, but she can help make amends by doing her community service. Kelly doesn't feel that will make up at all for what she did. When Blair came out of the coma and saw Kelly standing there, she couldn't speak, but Kelly knows from the look that Blair gave her that Blair knew who she was and what she did. Andrew thinks maybe Kelly imagined what was in Blair's thoughts, but Kelly is sure that Blair will never forgive her. Andrew says she has to forgive herself and work off the guilt with community service. Andrew is certain that in time, Blair will forgive her. Eli walks into the room. His watch is beeping, telling him it's time for his medication. Eli supposedly takes them(watching it again, he never even opens the pill bottle) and next he has to eat something. Andrew invites Eli to go to Andy and Antonio's wedding with him. Eli reluctantly agrees and Kelly decides to find some clothes for him to wear.

Andrew wants to take Eli over to Logan's and get him a nice blue blazer and an Oxford shirt. Kelly and Eli both object and Kelly finds him some nice clothes in the goodwill donations. Eli goes to try them on and get some food. Andrew compliments Kelly on her way with teenagers. This kid's different, Kelly replies, "this one breaks my heart."

Mel, Dorian and Blair

On the houseboat, Mel is reading the article about Eli and comments that he thinks Todd is actually doing some good for once with the article. Dorian says there has to be a catch. Mel reads from the article that Eli's mother died recently, he never knew his father and he had at least two abusive stepfathers. And besides all that he's HIV positive, how can a kid deal with all that, Mel wonders. "Children can survive all sorts of things", replies Dorian. "You impress me as someone who has survived all sorts of things yourself", Mel observes.

Dorian says that no child should have to live through what she did. Mel wants to talk about it, but Dorian tries to avoid it by saying they're running late. Everytime they try to discuss it, Dorian avoids the subject, clams up or tries to pick a fight. Mel promises it's safe for her to talk to him about it. Let's start with something easy, he says, where did Dorian grow up? Ohio, Dorian says. He knows that already, can she be more specific? Canton, Ohio. It's where her sisters were young and beautiful and vibrant, just before they went mad. They lived there happily until her parents were killed in a plane accident. This, of course, reminds Mel of his wife, who recently died in a plane crash. For months after the crash, Mel couldn't help but wonder what those last seconds were like for Muriel, his wife. 29 seconds can be a very long time, he wonders what was going through her mind. Dorian can tell him exactly what she was thinking, she was thinking of Mel and of the children. Sometimes it's a good idea to keep the door to the past closed. Mel's not sure he can do that. Dorian's done it for a long while and Mel can too, without the booze, Dorian says.

Mel and Dorian are in Blair's hospital room, waiting for Blair to come back from therapy. Dorian makes Mel promise he'll do whatever he can to make sure she doesn't tell Blair about the divorce or the custody hearing. Blair arrives back from her therapy session in a wheelchair. She looks tired, but is speaking well. Blair gets herself back in bed, she wants to hear everything that's going on in Llanview, beginning with Starr. Starr's just fine, Dorian says. Blair wants Dorian to file for custody right away, she wants Starr away from Todd now. When Dorian starts saying Todd is a good father, Blair knows something is wrong. Mel tells Dorian to give Blair the truth, she's asked for it and Dorian shouldn't lie to her. Dorian tells Blair that she lost the custody case and Todd has full custody of Starr. Dorian promises to reopen the case as soon as Blair is well. Blair doesn't understand how Todd could have gotten custody as a single parent, forcing Dorian to tell her about Todd and Téa's marriage.

At first Blair is stunned that they got married and that it all happened so fast. Then, she gets angry and her anger will motivate her to get well as quickly as possible. Blair gets out of bed and starts wheeling herself to the door. She wants to go back to physical therapy and convinces the doctor, who's coming back in at the time, to take her there. Dorian thinks they were wrong to tell Blair everything, "no good can come of that much truth."